New Lease on Life

Sep 18, 2007 by

9:07 a.m.

Today is lease signing day and calling the utility companies day. I’m feeling pretty good about it.

After having breakfast with a friend at Panera, I’m just waiting until it is time to go to the Horizons to sign my lease.

Some days I am so excited to move! Like this morning, when it took me 40 minutes just to get to Panera. I can’t wait to live closer! This morning I was also really excited about my new furniture that will be delivered on the 28th. Below are some pictures of it.

10:46 a.m.

So the lease signing went all right. I just don’t trust apartment complex personnel. I can’t help but feel like they are slimey and want you to just sign your life away without giving it a second thought. She tried to rush me through the lease, but I refused to let her. My father taught me better than that. All in all, the lease is fine, so I signed it.

I drove by my future apartment, as I like to do, to look at the outside of it. I took a picture of it so I can have it in my memory and then I won’t feel like driving by it a million times before I move in. Here’s what it looks like from the outside, with some graphical additions to point out where everything is.

I’ve also posted the floor plan of the place below:

So now I am back at work and before lunch it is my goal to make the calls I need to make to utility companies, etc.

Oh yeah, I also wanted to post some pictures of my new furniture! All of this stuff will be delivered on Sept. 28.

I’m going for matching darker woods through out the place.

My new bedroom set includes a king size bed, two night stands, and the chest of drawers pictured here.

My new dining room table comes with four chairs, with the table shown below, including the leaf.

My new couch is thick and comfy. I got the chair and what they call a “chair and a half” with an ottoman. The “chair and a half” can’t really be seen in the picture, but as you can tell from the name, it is wider than the average chair.

I also got a coffee table and TV stand that match each other. I’m still considering getting an end table to put between the couch and the super chair.

So I have a lot to look forward to, which I think helps me get through all of this a lot easier!

read more

Related Posts

Tags

Share This

The low times

Sep 17, 2007 by

So this is the time of night when it is the hardest.

Brian is in Atlanta tonight and I miss him quite a bit. We actually talked on the phone tonight for like 40 minutes. That’s a new trend. Our conversations are so real these days. What a shame.

These times are the hardest and I have a few theories why. First, as bed time approaches I miss that intimacy. I feel alone. But it feels different than that. It’s almost like a switch gets flipped every night, where I feel low.

Also tonight, I think it was the realization that tomorrow I’m going to sign my lease before going to work. I’ve been putting it out of my mind and now it’s at the forefront. Sometimes I want to yell out loud “Why is this happening?!?!”

I know that the answer will come to me. It just doesn’t make me feel any better about it.

read more

Related Posts

Tags

Share This

New URL, New Life

Sep 17, 2007 by

So I’ve moved my blog to a new URL. I stupidly gave out the old address to people who shouldn’t have it. Blogging is for me and for a select few. I hate feeling like I can’t blog about what is really going on in my life and blog honestly.

 

So here is the honest truth of my life, with the big headline first…

 

Brian and I are Separating

 

I ask anyone who reads this to keep it to themselves, because it is hard and I want to tell people on my own schedule and in my own way.

 

After having a pretty crappy year, Brian and I have decided to separate. We’re at the end of our lease in our current apartment, and together we have decided to move into our own places.

 

Anyone reading this might ask, what went wrong? Well to begin with, we don’t have terribly much in common. There was a lot we liked to do together, but a whole lot that each one of us wanted that the other person isn’t interested in. Once Brian and I had the same schedule, it began to drain us.

 

Then there is the perception problem. It is Brian’s perception that I don’t love him fully and that he is not an important person in my life. It is my perception that Brian doesn’t love me fully and that I am not an important person in his life. What it comes down to is that both of us loved each other the only way that we know how to love, but that is not how either of us want to be loved.

 

Then there is curiosity. Both of us are wondering if there is not a better mate out there for us. Someone who shares my dreams and goals, and someone that shares his.

 

So we are separating to see what happens.

 

I am incredibly disappointed about this. I swear that on our wedding day, I was so sure that this was it. And maybe it will be, but right now it is up in the air.

 

At first I did not handle it very well. We’d go through the plan, and I would break down and Brian would say, “Let’s not do it.” But I just had to push through it and go forward.

 

The Plan

 

Both of us got new apartments. I am moving back to the Horizons. I tried to find a new place that wasn’t where I started from. However, I couldn’t find somewhere else that was comparable to what I ended up getting. I ended up getting a two bedroom, two story townhouse with a two car attached garage. I am beyond excited about my new place. It is bittersweet.

 

Brian got a new apartment at a complex near our old one, over on 104th.

 

We are moving at the end of this month. We have hired movers to do the work for us, which I am so grateful for.

 

I got all new furniture, which I am really excited about it. It’s the first time that I have been able to purchase and pick out my own furniture, besides my couch. It’s so nice to not have hand-me downs or pieces that hold too many memories.

 

The cats are coming with me, which makes this all a little bit easier.

 

My Feelings

 

I have good days and bad days. I went through a phase where I was obsessed with the symbolic meaning of objects around our apartment. From the sheets on our bed to the wind-chimes on our porch, everything meant something. I swear that I would just look at something, anything, and break down. Ohh..that’s the trash can that we had in our kitchen.

 

I’m past that now and handling that better. I’m now scared about being alone at night time, that I will be so sad each night and lonely. Even though Brian and I are planning on spending time with each other and having sleep overs, I’m still nervous about it.

 

On good days I get pretty excited about it. Excited to live closer to work. Excited to start fresh.

 

Where We’re At

 

Weirdly enough, Brian and I have been really enjoying our time together. When we’re together and go out we have a good time and there’s a new chemistry. Maybe it’s because the pressure is off. I don’t know. I have no idea what the future will bring. I’m just taking it one day at a time.

 

This Blog

 

I’m going to try and write about my experience and my day-to-day ups and downs.

read more

Related Posts

Tags

Share This